Stuck in the In Between

8.31.2010

As my 25th birthday is officially less than 2 months away, I can't help but wish I could slow time down. I realize and understand that 25 is not old, and for most, still classified as young.

But I can't figure out if I want to be considered a full-fledged adult or linger for just a bit more in the classification as young.

Currently, I'm leaning towards the latter.

Though I do realize that the moment I walked to the end of that aisle just 2 short years ago, I stopped being a girl and had to become a woman. Not only in the eyes of my friends and family, but to God. Gone were my days of being selfish of my time and only concerning myself with my schedule.

Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. --
Genesis 2:24

In that aspect of "growing up", I'm good to go. I love being the wife to Andrew James. Don't get me wrong--it has it's hardships and frustrations. But I wouldn't trade it for anything. But truly having a peace about no more college {yes I know that it's been over since May 2008} and knowing that in the future, not only can I not be a child, but I will have a child is just all a little too much for me to really wrap my head around. Shifting seasons and mindsets has always been difficult for me, but I'm trying. I think there are things that I will always be nostalgic about, but currently these are the things I long for to happen again: school {not the work--just the fun stuff}, beach trips with my parents, the excitement of Christmas morning {I still get excited and love Christmas, just a more "grown-up" way} and carefree summer days. The bill paying part and being responsible part doesn't really bother me...I'm odd I know. I know there are seasons for a reason, and that God teaches us in every single one of those...so for now, that's what I'm holding on to--the lesson God has for me.

I'm Dreaming Of...

8.27.2010

...rainy, cold Saturdays...

....hoodies....

...Friday night & Saturday afternoon football...

...a big pot of chili...

...pumpkins...

....Thanksgiving dinner...

....bright red, orange, yellow leaves...

....using our fireplace for the 1st time...

....jeans & sweaters....

...crisp, cool mornings...

....can you tell what I'm ready for?



A Stroke of Genius!

8.25.2010

For many of you 20 somethings out there, you know what I'm talking about when I say "budget". This is a word I've never been terribly fond of or something I've been really good at keeping. But regardless, Andrew and I have been discussing on how to make one that we can stick to. We're doing just fine financially, but there is always room for improvement and ways to make smarter decisions.  With that said, we were able to receive the tax credit that the federal government was offering for incentive for 1st time home buyers, so we've been blessed with money that we would have otherwise not had.

Now comes the time for smart decisions.

There are a myriad of things that we want but there are more things that we need to take care of in the Janke household.  The biggest of those is credit card debt. We could get at least one if not two paid off with money left over. The other side of that is that we really want to fence in the backyard for our 4-legged children.  I, however, after much thought and babbling to my poor co-worker, decided that we should pay off the biggest credit card balance and we would still have enough to pay for a fence if we chose to do it ourselves.

It's a win-win situation; we conquer something that needs to be done and taken care of, as well as possibly getting something that is more of a want and somewhat of a need.
Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another, for he who loves his fellowman has fulfilled the law.
--Romans 13:8 {NIV}

 

Picture of the Day

My New Love

8.21.2010

Yes, you read that correctly. I have a new love. And actually, I've been having loving feelings for quite sometime. This is something that I find absolutely irresistible, desirable and impossible to stay away from.

What could it be to have me feeling so strongly...


Stonyfield Organic Low-Fat French Vanilla yogurt! I seriously cannot get enough of it! It's great by itself, or topped with fresh blueberries, strawberries and whatever else you can think of.

If you haven't had it, I highly recommend it!

An absolute delight!


Lessons from Lessons

8.19.2010

I assure you that that title makes sense.

You just have to read this post to know I'm telling the truth.

Have you ever heard of the book "All I Really Need To Know I Learned in Kindergarten"?  Well I have a different take; all I really need to know, I've learned during horseback riding lessons. It's true! It really hit me this past week at my lesson {hence the title} how much can be applied to life from the saddle.

1. Multi-tasking is an absolute must. When you're in the saddle, you're focusing on your hands, legs, head, heels, etc. It can be a little overwhelming at times, but all of those little things together, make a big difference. For instance, when asking the horse to turn or to "bend", placement of hands and how far apart they are play a large factor on whether the horse will be able to do what your asking correctly. In life, what path you're on, what you're looking towards, and what you're holding on to and how tightly, all factor into where your life is heading.

trotting a circle






2. Remain calm no matter what. This is definitely one of those things that are easier said that done, in life and riding. When mounted on an animal that ways 1,200lbs, it can be difficult to remind yourself to stay calm no matter the situation. Horses know when you're nervous, scared or unsure and as soon as they sense that, they know they're in control. In this situation, you definitely want to be in control.  Again, being in a situation on a saddle that is terrifying, this is much easier to to type than to put into practice. In life, we're not in control; God is. And that in itself can be scary. As humans, we want to be in control and holding the reins of life so to speak. But, God is who He is, and there is really no sense in questioning. Regardless of being nervous, scared and unsure, the most important thing to remember is that in any situation, it's better that we're not in control.

never happier than when I'm in the saddle
3.  Keeping it clean. It's astounding how many things have to be clean in barn. I realize that may sound a little odd considering it is a barn, but it's true. Stalls, feeding/water buckets, saddles, bridles, the horse itself...the list goes on and on! I don't think I really need to explain how these things are related; your home needs to be clean or at least tidy, your clothes, your thoughts and speech, etc. Cleanliness is not something that is optional with horses or with personal life.

I know that some may make you think "well, duh!" but, all of these really dawned on me on Tuesday. I consider myself so blessed to be able to have the chance to ride once again and I will take everything I can from it.




I Know Him as a Provider

8.16.2010

{This is an extremely open and honest post}

I am starting to feel like there are way too many posts that revolve around this; trusting the Lord, or in my case, my lack of trust in many areas. I found out after accepting this job at URS working on the Clean Air Works! project, that it had an expiration date for January 2011. Needless to say, I was frustrated and a little angry that I had not been informed of this before accepting this position. But I accepted it and told myself that God placed me here for a purpose and that I need to have a Godly attitude during the months I hold this job. I am really struggling to have faith in this season of unknowing and trusting the Lord is something I know I must do in this season.  I have to have the faith to know that the Lord is either preparing another job for me after this one, or preparing Andrew and I for the chance that there isn't a job to follow.  And though, I really, REALLY hope that there is a job being prepared for me, I know that our God is a provider and that He will provide for us in His unwavering way if that happens.


Please be praying for my thoughts and attitude towards this job and season. And pray that the Lord is preparing us for whatever is coming after January.

Whoever speaks, is to do so as one who is speaking the utterances of God; whoever serves is to do so as one who is serving by the strength which God supplies; so that in all things God may be glorified through Jesus Christ, to whom belongs the glory and dominion forever and ever. Amen.
~1 Peter 4:11

My Loves

8.13.2010

Now there are many things in my life that I'm fond of, but there a handful of things that I absolutely love and can't get enough of.

{These are in no particular order}

1. The University of North Carolina Men's Basketball Team. Regardless of how many times this group of men break my heart, I keep going back. Year after year, I put my heart and mind through absolute {at times} hell. I care far too much about the game and about this team, but I just can't help it. This is a team I've cried over, shouted in anger, shouted in joy, and over all, had a very strong relationship with. This is my focal point for the better part of 6 months. And if I'm being honest with myself, I focus on them a lot more than that. Thankfully, God blessed me with a husband that is equally {if not more so} in love with that beautiful shade of blue

 



2. Christmas Lights...{actually anything Christmas}. I honestly believe that everything is prettier at Christmas time and if you add twinkling lights to that, it is absolute magic. I have already warned Andrew that he will be putting Christmas lights on our house this year.



3. Our Dogs. Seriously, I love our dogs like they're our children. And for now, they are. But it's one of the best parts of my day to come home and see them. They're so excited and so happy. Just because you're there. They give kisses, wag their tail, curl up beside, and just let you know that they love you. I believe that they are the best investment we've ever made {even over our house}



4. Taking pictures. If you haven't guessed, I'm a little on the paparazzi side when it comes to pictures. What can I say, I like documentation. I enjoy knowing that our trips, events and lives can be made into hard copies. Why not take pictures?

A good snapshot stops a moment from running away. ~Eudora Welty



5. Blogs. Though that sounds incredibly generalized {and it is I suppose}, I love reading blogs and writing this one. It's amazing the insight you can learn just from someone's blog. To the left of this post, there are a list of blogs that I love reading. Some of bloggers I know, and some I have never and will never meet. But that's okay. I am envious often times of the amount of followers certain blogs I have, but the feeling never lasts. Some blogs are incredibly structured when it comes to their content, but my blog is like me; completely random and rambling. I'm okay with it, and if you're reading this, then I suppose you are too. I understand that I may post too much about how I love my life and whatnot, but why not express that as much as possible? It's a great thing to write about!

6. New York City. This is probably my absolute favorite city in the United States. While I don't know if I could live there for an extended period of time, I could visit it mulitple times a year if it were financially possible for us. It has a sentimental meaning to me as well; Andrew and I first started cultivating a romantic relationship in the big apple many years ago {or what feels like many years ago}. In fact, the first time that we had held hands was crossing a busy street in Manhattan. Sweet new love. We're making plans to go down there in December because Carolina is playing Rutgers at Madison Square Garden. So I will get 3 loves simultaneously; Tar Heel basketball, Christmas decorations galore and NYC! I will be one happy girl
I could make this post much longer, but I will leave it at that. Like I said, random and rambling.

Enjoy!

Scaredy Cat

8.12.2010

Do you ever get scared?

I'm not talking about a bump in the night, monsters under the bed kind of scared. I'm talking about fear of the unknown or of the possibilities you don't want to imagine. I know that as a child of God, the unknown should never effect me. I know that He is my provider and my protector. But often times, I allow the world to get in my head and I worry.  I worry that after this project ends in a matter of months that I won't be able to find a new job. I worry that someway, somehow, when Andrew and I try to start our family, we won't be able to. I worry about things that I know aren't in my hands and that I never had control over in the first place. I know that, yet I still worry. I pray about it constantly, and I try so hard to shut up the world and the enemy. And other days are easier than some. But it is my resounding struggle day in and day out.

I realize that I'm being unbelievably open and honest, but it's been on my heart to write about it. I know that the Lord is going to do what is best, and what His will is.

I know that...but....

The OCD tendencies I have can sometimes be too much and I want to grip on to something that I for some reason thought I had control over in the first place. NEWSFLASH-- I never had control over them.

Everyday I'm learning a little bit more about how true that is and I honestly believe that the Lord is revealing to me {as He often does}, that all I have to do, is lay it down and He'll handle it.

Besides, who am I to question?

Ready for the Boys of Fall...

Just Stop & Think

I often think that I may say this a lot, but why shouldn't I?

My life is good great!

Seriously. Sometimes I can hardly contain my joy and praise to the Lord for His blessings on my life. I am so incredibly undeserving of the love I have from Him, my family and friends. I have a loving and Godly husband; 2 amazing sets of parents; the best friends a girl could ask for; and last but not least, Sam & Dani.

And just in case all of those things weren't enough, I am in the saddle {literally} once again! At least once a week, I go up to Winget Farm and ride or do barn work or both. And doing either one, brings me total peace and happiness!



I am blessed.

Thursday Ramblings

8.05.2010

This post will be filled we nothing but my random thoughts of the day. That's right. These are just from today.

1. Is there a snack food or meal that when you eat it, it brings you back to your childhood? I have a multitude, but one sticks out in particular
Mrs. Freshley's Pecan Twirls. These are an absolute delight! They're sweet, but not too much so and they are the perfect size.  They remind me of my great-grandparents and that's always a pleasant memory

2. I love grapes, but hate all grape-flavored things except jelly. My biggest issue with the flavored stuff is that it doesn't taste a bit like grapes.

3. Along the same lines with jelly, in general, I prefer strawberry. But there is one large exception to that rule; PB&J's HAVE to be constructed with..wait for it...grape jelly! Can't explain it. That's just the way it is.

4. And finally, one thing that will always make me happy is having a vase of flowers on our kitchen table. It just makes it seem so fresh and open



I Try Not to Rush...

8.04.2010

This is always the hardest time of year for me.

I've reached the end of my desire for summer weather and start longing for jeans and jackets. I love fall. I really and truly do. The crisp air, having the windows open, and most of all, football season! Ah...all of it is so refreshing.

I keep trying to remind myself to enjoy the month of August {and probably the larger part of September} because this year has already flown by. And much of this month will be packed. But I'll enjoy most of it, so no complaining here! One thing on my to do list for this fall is to make it up to Boone at least once!  The weather there is the epitome of autumn in my opinion.

What about you guys? Ready for summer to end or to continue? I want to know if I'm in the minority



 
 
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