A Walking Contradiction

10.06.2011

Marriage can change moment to moment. The core aspects remain, but some times are more serious than others and vice versa.

And after 3 years of marriage, I've learned that's okay.

Too many times, I've tried to compare myself to other wives and Andrew to other husbands. Keep in mind that some of these said "wives" and "husbands" read from scripts in front of cameras, but that's besides the point. I try to fit shove us into a mold that the world has made. Big mistake. Huge.

My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you..if you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world
--John 15:12 & 19

I know that this world is not what I need to be striving for; it is God's way and God's love that I need to be comparing myself and my marriage to. But the real life marriages that I'm around and witness, we {Andrew and I} can learn and be blessed by those. God has placed those couples in our life for that very reason and I pray we don't let those opportunities to grow pass us by. 

My marriage and my life with Andrew is indescribable. He can drive me crazy and make me slam doors. He also is the one that holds me and prays for and with me. He "dances" and sings silly songs to cheer me up and to entertain me...and sometimes himself. He makes me laugh, smile, think and praise God daily for him. 

He pushes me and listens to me.

He loves me. 

He is my best friend. 

Marriage, like life, is what you make of it. It can be stressful and wonderful all at the same time. It is a walking contradiction. Too often, I let my work day or other outside factors drag me down and I don't take the time to remind Andrew how much I love him and how thankful I am that he is mine. I'm trying to work on that and make it a point to be "active" and not just a by stander in my marriage. To give more than just a fleeting kiss or hug in the morning or a perfunctory "I love you" at the end of a conversation or the day. Marriage, like my walk with the Lord, requires effort and my whole heart. They both require constant time, patience and love and neither allow for laziness or for me to be lukewarm. They go hand and hand. 

 Yesterday I heard these words...

When you’re weak, I’ll be strong
When you let go, I’ll hold on
When you need to cry, I swear that I’ll be there to dry your eyes
When you feel lost and scared to death,
Like you can’t take one more step
Just take my hand, together we can do it
I’m gonna love you through it.  
"I'm Gonna Love You Through It" Martina McBride


I thought "those words perfectly describe my relationship with my husband" and then I realized they perfectly describe my relationship with my Father. He is everything I'm not and everything I need and more. And He blessed me with a husband that completes me in a way no one else could. Our marriage isn't perfect nor is it like anyone else. We are a work in progress and at times, a walking contradiction. 
But during that walk, we're both holding onto each other and the Lord.

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4 i love your comments!:

Allie said...

This is great. :)

kristyn ellen said...

Oh, it is a walking contradiction, I agree. It is so much different than I ever expected, but so much better. It is constantly changing and improving my heart -- and drawing me closer to God. Which I know was HIS intention... that guy is smart. ;)

Megan said...

I feel like you have been speaking from my heart lately!! I have been reflecting a lot on marriage lately, I guess because we just celebrated the first year.

Alexis Kaye said...

wow you are such an exmaple! I've been married about 5 months, so less experience, but I've seen what you're talking about to be true. I wrote a post recently and in it I talked abotu rememberingyour committment to each other. We were fighting and I looked on the wall to see our wedding photos and nothing else mattered :) It's easy to find lots of reasons your husband bugs you, but it's much better for everyone to focus on all the good they have! :) Congrats on your 3 year anniversary!

 
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