A Blogging Epiphany


My last post was February 12.  It is now March 5.

Does anyone else see a problem with that??

I do and since before February 12, I've been trying to figure out what that problem is.  Do I not like blogging anymore? Do I want to stop writing about our semi-boring lives and random travels? The answer to both of those questions led me to believe that I was not ready to relinquish the title of "blogger."

That was the easy part, but now I was face with the hard part; figuring out what the aforementioned problem is and why blogging had become so difficult.  After writing the most rambling, incoherent post of my life (or anyone elses for that matter), it dawned on me; I worry too much and put unnecessary pressure on myself.  I am known for making things harder than they should be, but that never had a place in my ability to write.

Until now. Or, last year, to be more exact. Making things harder than they need to be is something I don't like nor want, but I am incredibly good at doing.  I get in my head, get comfortable with making things complicated and find it nearly impossible to get out.  Don't ask me to explain why I am this way because I am not even close to knowing.

So how does my worrying and unnecessary pressure building tie into writing?  The not so simple answer to this came during an epiphany this past weekend; it's as though I'm worried that what I'm writing won't measure up to some non-existent scale, but last time I checked, there is no grading system for blogging.

(the more I write this post, the crazier I seem, but I'm committed to explaining myself, even if it's just to me)

Because of my severe lack of writing, my head has felt cluttered and the other part of the previously mentioned epiphany was me figuring out that blogging serves as a release for me.  Even if the posts I write are essentially about nothing, it's just what I need.  I write it out, read it and then move on.

I know the best way to get out of my head and to stop worrying, even about blogging, would be to dive headfirst into the good word of the Lord. I realize that is a very "Christian-y" thing to say, but truly, there is a difference when I am intertwining my days with His merciful words.  The reminder of His unfailing grace and mercy over me restores me and guides me through the darkness that is my head.

Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. 
Philippians 4:4-7

Now, I realize that being a better blogger is not something that really warrants prayer, but I also know I am a better wife, friend and daughter when I don't let worry and pressure consume my days.  I like blogging and I like being a social media butterfly.  I don't think it takes away from my life, but adds to it.  I like seeing what is going with my blogging "friends" and being part of such an awesomely bizarre community.

Blogging is my release and I owe it to myself (sorry to sound selfish) to put more time into it. My head needs it...my life needs it.  I was hopeful that when I wrote this post, it would not be the chaotic mess that it ended up being, but I find it borderline comical.  It is the epitome of a brain dump and it was completely and utterly what I needed.

So I ask you to just bare with me in these coming posts because changes are I'll need that grace thing that I mentioned earlier.


3 i love your comments!:

Michaela said...

Blogging is my release as well! I love that verse you included. You're wonderful. I'll be praying that you can clear your head and write it out here on this blog :) xoxo

Kristin said...

I completely get what you're saying Maggie! Blogging CAN be therapeutic, but we can also let it become overwhelming. It's so easy to want to compare, judge, and be hard on yourself - even when nobody else is! And, btw. I don't think anything is so insignificant that it couldn't benefit from prayer - even blogging :-). Look forward to seeing what the future holds!

a boy a girl and a pug said...

Blogging is my escape too. Somedays though if I don't blog I beat myself up about...I need to work on that. Loved this post and can totally relate.

template design by Studio Mommy (© copyright 2015)